Are you a music lover? Have at least 2 fingers or toes? Ever thought about becoming a DJ? We wish there was more required, but who are we kidding? With YouTube, you can learn how to be a DJ within minutes. We took a look at this vocation and uncovered the funniest jokes and memes related to these folks who have us jumping up and down and waving body parts in ways usually reserved for the privacy of our home. Join us as we have some laughs regarding DJs and the lives they lead.
Why did the DJ like to shop at Costco? For all of the samples he could get.
My brother said he didn’t want to be a part of the family DJ business. 6 months later he pleaded for a job. Didn’t take long to see how the turntables!
Do you recall when the grandfather asked the DJ to turn up the volume at his grandson’s wedding reception? That’s what you call sound advice!
What did the DJ say when his incompetent intern ruined the show? He said there would be real percussions.
How does the DJ get the vegetable farmers on their feet? He tells them to dance to the beet!
A retired cop became a DJ. Because he still gets to say “Put your hands up in the air.”
What did they call the DJ each time he got dumped by a girlfriend? Homeless.
What does the DJ call his pet birds? His tweeters of course!
What reason did Dj Khaled give about not liking Pokemon? “It wouldn’t Say My Name.”
What do you have when you put DJ Snake with fart fetish art? Bepp…Burp…Bepp…Burp…Bepp…Bepp…Pfff…Burp…!
Why are the most famous DJ’s from India? They have Sikh beats.
Why did the DJ almost drown? He kept syncing.
Why did the new record/DJ shop go out of business so soon? The named it Vinyl Solution.
Why was the DJ fired from working at the nursing home? They said that his repeated playing of the song “Last Christmas” was cruel and inappropriate.
The DJ was let go from the lab: everyday he was dropping the base.
Why did the DJ stop playing 80’s music at the farmers’ radio station? He was tired of hauling oats.
Why did the husband tell his wife she wouldn’t be a good DJ? Because she refuses to listen to Logic or Reason.
Ever hear about DJ Clumsy Italian Cook? He always dropped the basil.
DJ Khaled just created an exercise app Just when you finish a set, his voice comes on and says “Another one”.
Why did the DJ lose his job at the chemistry lab? He dropped the base too many times.
Why is every Dutch person so tall? Because DJs Jump a lot.
Why is DJ Khaled one of the best in the music industry? Because he loves major keys!
What kind of electronic music did the DJ’ing young polar bear prefer? Cubstep.
What do doctors call it when a DJ goes into cardiac arrest? A beat drop.
Why did the DJ want to go back in time? He enjoyed being a a different ERA ERA ERA ERA.
Do you know about the DJ who only plays at hamburger joints? They call him MC Donald’s.
How many pounds did DJ Khaled plan to lose with the help of Jenny Craig? Another one.
Why is the DJ always practicing Karate? It’s the best way he knows to break beets!
What did they call the DJ who was a warlock? A Wicca-Wicca-Wiccan.
Why did the DJ at the country radio station think he would lose his job? He inadvertently put the same song on auto repeat for 3 hours. Luckily, the listeners didn’t detect anything out of the normal.
If Osama Bin Laden became a DJ, what would he be called? Osama Spin Laden.
What did the dancing salad say to the DJ? “Lettuce turnip the beet man!”
Where do you go online to learn about DJs? The wiki wiki page.
It’s all the DJ’s fault. First, he started with the Cha Cha Slide, so I danced with the Cha Cha Slide. Second, he played The Cupid Shuffle, so I danced with the Cupid Shuffle too. Then he played Come On Eileen, and I’m the one who gets arrested!
Why did the DJ like to go trick or treating every Halloween? Because he was the boogie-man.
Why did the woman call her ex-husband a zombie DJ? Because he was a dead beat father.
What do you call a DJ who gets head while he’s on the radio? Radiohead.
If a DJ started selling shoes for kittens, what would the business be called? Boots and Cats.
Why was the DJ empty-handed after a full day of fishing? He was always dropping the bass.
So do these DJ jokes have you spinning round and round? Hold on tight cuz we’ve still got lots more to share with you!
What did the DJ say to the mugger? Just take my money, I don’t want any treble.
What did they call the DJ’ing dog who also delivered sandwiches? A sub-woofer!
What did DJ Khaled say about the recent Palestinian rocket attacks? Here comes “ANOTHER ONE!!’
What name did the DJ give to his newborn triplets? Ricky, Ricky, Ricky.
What did the DJ say to his son who wanted to follow in his footsteps? If you want to be successful, you must start from scratch.
What did the stammering DJ say to the crowd? I’m gonna “D-D-DDDD-DROP THE BASS”
What sauce did the DJ always ask for at the restaurant? m’Erra n’Erra.
What did they call the guy who failed at being a DJ? Disableton.
Why was the melon couple forced to have a big wedding ceremony and party with a DJ? Their parents said they can’t cantaloupe.
Why did the DJ suddenly stop breathing? Because he was off the air.
How many DJs are needed to screw in a lightbulb? Just one more.
What did the DJ shout when his roommate was about to use his favorite jelly? Thats my JAM!
What did the DJ say when handed his salad? Lettuce turnip the beet!
All these silly jokes about DJ Khaled are immature. I can’t take hearing another one.
What did the DJ call his musical plant? A photosynthesizer.
How did they track down DJ Jazzy Jeff at the North Pole? They just followed the fresh prints.
What does a DJ do each time a jazz musician comes to his house? He gets into the back seat and says “To the airport please.”
Why was the DJ asked to leave the grocery store? He was taking too many samples.
Why did the gold medalist fail at becoming a DJ? He was always breaking records.
Why does DJ Khaled like to announce his name at the start of each song? How else would people know to change the station?
There’s a new DJ called DJ Asian Immigrant. He really knows how to lay down some sick tracks.
How is a police officer able to relate with a DJ? They both shout at drunks to put their hands up.
When does a person tell you that they’re a DJ? The moment they open their mouth.
How do you tell when a DJ is confused? They are always scratching their head.
